Having spent the last several years in hippie-central, Boulder, CO, summertime = folk and bluegrass music. I heard this song yesterday, and oh how it reminded me of college and Boulder summers!

Heading to Tahoe tomorrow to reunite with my dear college friends for the week. I had never seen this video until I looked it up today: it literally had me laughing out loud. We might not be doing a drum circle on the dock, but this song will definitely be blasting...

week two update.

"Yogas citta vrtti nirodhah." 

 - Patanjali, Sutra 1.2

"The restraint of the modifications of the mind-stuff is Yoga."

-Sri Swami Satchidananda's Translation and Commentary of The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali

When I did my yoga teacher training last year, I was meditating everyday, multiple times a day.  I was astounded by the positive outcome of quieting "the mind-stuff".  For me, meditation has always been terrifying; it still is.  It takes a lot of commitment. It can be frustrating and sometimes boring. But, I have not one ounce of disbelief in its powers.  It's a hard thing for me to talk about, especially when my dedication to it is lacking, I really don't know too much about it, and I haven't been doing it for very long.  Even with a sporadic practice, it has altered my mind drastically.  My teacher in Bali taught me that one of the most important parts of meditation is the act of returning: I would sit cross-legged, eyes closed, and focus on my breath grazing the skin just beneath my nose. If countless thoughts took over, which they usually did, my most important lesson was that I could notice that had occurred, and return my concentration back to the skin above my lip, and focus on my breath.  She said as long as you could bring yourself back to your breath, you were improving. And once you had been exposed to it, the realization of that present moment, when the thoughts had disappeared and you were simply left with your breath, you could never forget that exposure. Over time, the thoughts became less, the meditation was longer, and I felt more in control of what I allowed into my mind.  I had a completely different view of how I moved, how I observed, how I processed things, and how I responded.  How I breathed, how I lived, and functioned in my body, mind, and soul.  The present moment became clearer.  And, when I can recognize and simply be in the moment, I become completely overwhelmed with gratitude and peace.

For the last two weeks, I have been doing three minutes of inversions everyday, as an experiment/challenge.  My physical yoga and meditation practice had significantly diminished over the past month and a half. I wanted to see if the inversions would inspire me to get back to it.  It has.  And, the three minutes of inversions have become a sort of meditation in itself. I have noticed how much more aware of my breath I am throughout the day.  My breath will interrupt my chatting brain and calm me, if only for a moment, the moments appear more frequently than before.  I really believe that our thoughts cause most of our suffering.  The energy and time wasted worrying about the unknown, creating scenarios, judging ourselves and others with misconceptions and lies... So, if I can decrease the "mind-stuff," the chatter, I think I would appreciate each moment of life so much more. Like I said last week, are these inversions really the reason for these changes? Who knows.  But, there has been a shift.

"They don't realize the limitations of thought."

-Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth

Cheers: to whatever life throws our way.

"And I will show that there is no imperfection in the present, and 

can be none in the future, 

And I will show that whatever happens to anybody it may be turn'd to 

beautiful results..." 

Walt Whitman, Starting from Paumanok

Matthew Ward in charcoal. By the infamous and amazing, Matthew Ward.

week one update.

I started my inversion challenge a week ago. And, well, I have not reached enlightenment yet..., but!!!!!! I have seen some progress: I have definitely noticed an increase in my energy levels; I've had about 3 cups of coffee in the last week (which is much better than 12!); no cigarettes in the past three days, along with very few cravings; I've been working out a lot more; sleeping more soundly; and my body awareness and senses feel heightened.

Hmm... interesting. Is it because of the inversions, or did I just need some motivation? We'll see. Off to go stand on my head.

Yes. Premsela's upcoming exhibition.

somehow, someway, i found myself back in New York much sooner than i had anticipated. i had to go out for work, very last minute. it was nice to know that my love for the city is true; it wasn't just based off the excitement of getting out of town a few weeks ago. i was talking to a girlfriend last night, and she was saying how she could never live there, because she needed to be around nature. i totally get that, and i think surrounding yourself with wildlife is important. but, there is something so beautiful about the buildings, the art, and the urban life that i find captivating and just as important as seeing the stars at night. the city is a living thing in itself, or at least a representation of one. what do you think?

the power of inversions

i spilled coffee on my keyboard last week, and now the letter "i" doesn't work. so, i have to copy/paste it every time i use it. and i am not going to do that for capital "i's" as well... so, forgive me if posts are few and far between until i decide to get this fixed.

so, my lesson in this: cut back on coffee. i have had an infatuation with coffee since i was about eight or nine (the number "eight" doesn't work either). coffee is bold, sexy, masculine, dangerous, dirty, pompous... i just love it. but, i don't love being anxious, which caffeine definitely does to me, and i don't love relying on something. sometimes a cup of coffee is the only thing that will get me out of bed and to work. and, with the coffee, stems all the other addictions: you drink coffee because you drank too much whiskey last night; it pairs perfectly with your cigarette; that cup is the one thing that brings a smile, when you're doing shit you really don't want to be doing...

okay, so, if i scale back on my coffee consumption, will the other habits slowly fade as well? and then, what do you replace your time and need for satisfaction with instead? inversions.

twenty-eight day challenge: do an inversion for three minutes everyday, for twenty-eight days. an inversion, in yoga, is basically any pose that brings your head lower than your heart. for example, a handstand. it can also be something as simple as lying down on your back, with your legs up against a wall. my yoga teacher in Bali,  told us about a man who claimed that if you do inversions for three minutes everyday, for twenty-eight days, it would change your life. the benefits of inversions are astounding: they can help calm your mood or be incredibly energizing (depending on the type of inversion or your level as a student); inversions aid in digestion; they help blood circulation; strengthen upper body and boost confidence; heighten body awareness; just to name a few... but, what is most interesting to me is that inversions literally change your perspective on how you see things.

i have been trying to be aware of how i process events and people that come in and out of my life. and lately, i feel like my life has been moving in a lot of different directions; i'm not always sure how to digest it all. sometimes i handle it with grace, sometimes with frustration and doubt. so, how do i change my behavior and habits, so i am more mindful and present? i'm not saying inversions are the answer, but i think they might help.